How to Stop a So Called Friend from Putting You Down

You have a "friend" who can be funny and fun to be with sometimes, but in front of others, puts you down or uses you as the butt of jokes or pranks. How do you handle this unusual relationship? Is there any chance you can change things?




Steps
1
If your "frienemy" is hurting you, stand up for yourself and do it right away,dont take the pain. There is nothing as effective as simply making it known that you Have Respect for Yourself and Be Respected.You don't have to be mean or snotty. Just say, "Hey, was that nice?" If there are others around, there's a good chance at least one of them will join in on your side. Definitely, no matter what the outcome is, don't wait - don't let this treatment drag on. When you allow it to continue without protesting, your "friend" may continue putting you down. Make sure s/he realizes that's not the case, right away.
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2
Talk to this friend privately. Sometimes, momentum gets a hold on us and we do dumb things, not knowing how to stop once we get started. If this happens, hopefully you can be a good sport and put up with it for one night (or day). Later, when you can have some privacy, talk to your friend. Let him or her know that your feelings were hurt by the things s/he said, and although you allowed it to continue even after you mentioned it the last time you were together, you will not be so indulgent next time. Ask why s/he used you as a punch line for all of the jokes s/he told, or why s/he felt s/he had to talk about you that way. Giving your friend a chance to reflect on what s/he did might help him or her avoid that behavior in the future.
3
Make yourself heard no matter what. Some people just won't get a clue, even if you hand it to them. Maybe your friend just won't control herself. Notice: won't. Because the truth is, she could if she wanted to. If your friend privately promises to cut it out, but then does it again. and again...and again, you have a deeper problem. Remember that it's okay to care about her as much as she cares about you. If she doesn't care that she is hurting your feelings, then you should not care that she will be embarrassed when you stand up and say, "Hey. I asked you to stop using me for a punching bag. I talked to you last time, and then we talked privately, and you said you understood. Now I'm telling you: I'm not going to put up with it any more. Stop it." If she's upset by it, too bad. You need to show enough strength and backbone to protect yourself - don't insult her, or join in with name-calling or being a jerk - just stand up, state the problem, say what you expect from here on out, and then hope that all the rest of the people there are decent enough to back you up. Most people are uncomfortable when one person is picking on someone else. If you point out very vocally that you are tired of being picked on this way, most people will side with you.
4
End the friendship if you must. If this person will not respect you, no matter how hard you try or how many chances you have given him or her, it's time to accept the fact that this person is not a true friend. Chances are if you have a "breakup" conversation, this person will simply roll his or her eyes and call you a bad sport. Don't bother - just be less and less available to go out and have "fun" with this so-called friend. Let it drift until you've drifted apart and call yourself fortunate to have a new opportunity to make friends of a better caliber.